Again
by you're my Star
Summary: She's can't get rid of him, and she can't help but wonder if it's because she doesn't want to... [Oneshot DxG]


The last of her intentions was to hurt him, contrary to what he wanted her to believe, he was so fragile already, and she didn't want to bring him to breaking point. She couldn't keep up with their little dance anymore, the music was to fast and she was to slow.

He was notorious, known for his name, that's all he was, a name, a threatening, venomous, name. He was a Malfoy, you either loved Malfoys or you hated them, your family was either envious of them or against them. Ginny was the exception; she broke the rules as she always did.

The last of her intentions was to break him down, push him deeper into the hole he was stuck in, and force him to live the life he was supposed to live. He wasn't the only one with a life to get living; they were just slowing each other down.

The music was to fast, and she just couldn't keep up anymore.

_The life she'd worked so hard to nail down fell apart when his hand touched hers, when he brushed against her in passing, or when they exchanged those lethal glares. She stared hard at him, concentrating on those steel silver eyes, memorizing every speckle of gray in them. A chill ran down her spine, his eyes did that to her._

It was late and she should be sleeping right now, but what was the point, she couldn't get away from him in dreams either. Nightmares followed her through the night; he was always the star of them, hogging the spotlight. She didn't have pleasant dreams; she had nightmares that made her want to sleep with her light on. And he was the star in every one of them. Thanks a lot, Draco.

_Ginny woke up, her breath was quick and she felt her hair sticking to the back of her neck, images of _him _flashed through her mind, she was up the rest of the night trying to wipe him from her mind, but he was inside her head and she couldn't get him out._

She couldn't outrun him, she'd been with him for to long and he'd managed to turn her world upside down. It couldn't be undone, but it couldn't be ignored. He'd gotten under her skin and was driving out of her mind.

He was like a car crash, dangerous and thrilling. Terrifying, you wanted to get away, but there's no way out. You just have to pray you survive the impact. He was exactly like a car crash.

_Ginny's face was blank, her mind was the polar opposite._

"_Weaslette?" A flash of ghost white flashed before Ginny, Draco waving a hand in front of her face._

"_Malfoy?" She kept her eyes glued straight ahead._

"_What?"_

"_Nothing, I was just wondering how I got here." Ginny muttered, continuing with her thoughts. She left out that she was also wondering how to get away._

"Ginny?" He raised an eyebrow at her and smirked. He probably had a million sick little fantasies flying around in his head about why she'd asked him to come out here. He was leaning against the bleachers, tossing a dead snitch from one hand to another.

"Hey." She said, approaching him, the night air was cold and the ground was damp. The sky was fuzzy with a mosaic of stars and airy clouds, it was the perfect backdrop for a breakup scene, Ginny couldn't help but notice this.

"You needed me? Or should I say you _wanted_ me." Draco smirked; cockiness and arrogance were woven through his every word. He could stand to have his ego knocked down a notch or two.

Ginny hated how he sparkled in the night, the white of his hair, and his powder soft skin contrasting perfectly to the black of the night, he seemed to glow, he looked superior. He wasn't though, he was beneath her, a coward he was.

Ginny struggled, being a coward as well, she wasn't sure if she could go through with what she was about to do. He was a delicate disaster, a mess. He simply wouldn't let anyone know, he attempted to take care of himself, he didn't always succeed. She had no idea if he'd be able to care of himself with her out of his life. The results could be disastrous.

She didn't know where the breakup would lead to, though she pondered it often, it was always in the back of her mind. Ginny had been with him so long she had no idea what she'd do with herself when he was gone. _What would he do?_

"I called you out because we need to talk Draco." Something flashed through his eyes, recognition perhaps? These words probably weren't very new to him. He looked taken aback for a second, but his smirk was there, he'd trained it to be there 100 percent of the time. Through thick and thin, that malicious smirk stuck with him.

"So talk." He said approaching her.

Ginny gained her composure; she prepared herself to make what could-be the biggest mistake of her. She readied herself to argue with him, she'd win, with her quick snappy comebacks and countless hexes.

They stood face to face, or rather face to chest; Ginny was almost a foot shorter than him. She looked up at him, her golden eyes met his silver ones, his eyes softened immediately. She did that to him, her eyes.

"Okay, Draco I've just been, you know…" Ginny pushed the words out with as all the force she could muster, he looked down on her, something soft in his sharp eyes, Ginny melted at his feet. "I've been wondering…" She drifted off, lost in his silver eyes.

His confidence seemed to falter for a second; he seemed to predict what was coming next. This just wasn't new to him… "Wondering?" He asked prompting her to continue.

"Wondering…"

"I've never seen you at a loss for words Weaslette." Draco said teasingly.

"There's a first time for everything," Ginny shot back defending herself. It was a little game they played, insults versus insults. Just little remarks to make the other defend themselves, it was a pride thing. The insults had gotten vicious before, especially when they were coming out of Draco's mouth, but Ginny could handle them.

"Anyway, Draco, god! Don't distract me!" Ginny bounced from one subject to another waiting for the right words to roll off her tongue in the right order.

"Is this distracting?" He asked. He then traced a thumb down her cheek weaving back and forth, ending where her robes first button was. He smirked all the while, that stupid smirk was permanently engraved on his face. Draco and that taunting smirk of him _were certainly _distracted her.

He made her forget the rest of the world, being with him was the only way to erase him from her thoughts.

"_So stop me, if it's so revolting to kiss a Malfoy, stop me." He spat, daring her, knowing she wouldn't. Somehow he'd already figured out everything about her, he knew she wanted him just as bad as he wanted her. He knew her inside out._

_She wanted to prove him wrong, she wanted to desperately._

… _She couldn't stop him._

She couldn't believe what he was doing; she couldn't believe she'd started something with this guy. With this stupid little Malfoy. The last thing he needed screwing with her head was this snake.

Here she was though, almost five months since they first got together, doing the exact opposite of what she'd planned on, his lips locked with hers. She couldn't remember why she didn't want Draco in her life. She couldn't remember anything. Except how good his lips felt against hers, and how soft his hair was.

She told herself to take a breath, to ignore him, to pull away. But she didn't listen to herself. And when they finally broke apart, life came flooding back in the space between them.

He was her drug, he was addicting, and it was nice well they high lasted. But life was still there when she got back.

"_Draco, we have to talk."_

"_About?"_

"_About… you know us… and what we're doing and all…" Ginny drifted off, the right words couldn't find their way out of her mouth._

_Obviously he didn't know how to answer to her jumble of random words._

"_And… you know—the stuff—" Draco arched an eyebrow._

_Ginny reminded herself of the nightmares, of the sneaking around, of the lies, and how much she hated herself for being with him._

_But she got lost in those steel colored eyes before she found the right combination of words._

Draco kicked a tree, hard. Ginny was gone, and she didn't see him pounding on the tree. She didn't see how angry with himself he was… she didn't see how angry with himself he was for being with her.

He cursed inwardly. He was ruining his own reputation, and he was just complicating his already infuriating life. With her in his life, he didn't have time to breath. She had a way of making him want to do things for her, had a way of making him want to make her happy, not that he'd admit to himself

She was to good for him, and he was holding her back. He didn't know how to get himself out of this one, this mess.

He wasn't even sure what he'd do without her, and he hated the uncertainty.

"_No Draco! I don't want you with Pansy!"_

"_Yeah? Then tell me, who do you want me with?" Draco yelled back at her. He was trying to get her to admit something neither wanted to._

_Ginny's words got caught in her throat. _Me,_ it's what she wanted to say. She wanted him, she wanted him for herself, and they had so much in common, it's just the way things should be. "You can have your secret little rendezvous with me, as long as you don't have a 'public' girlfriend." Ginny crossed her arms across her chest. It was her way, or no way._

"_Deal."_

Ginny stood in that same spot for a long time after Draco left.

She wanted things to be clear; she hated how she'd lost her way somewhere along the line. That was the problem, having to tiptoe around with him and lie all the time was driving her crazy. She needed him to be out of her life. It was just the way things should be.

Ginny sighed; all the words that she hadn't said to him were piling up. The sad thing is, the words left unsaid were the words that meant the most. Ginny rarely kept her feelings to herself, except around Draco.

He should be gone right now; she shouldn't have to worry about him anymore. But again, the words she didn't say were the words that were the most important.

Things used to be so simple. It was like she was in a maze now, things were complicated. Beyond that even.

She sat down and pulled her knees up to her chest, and buried her face in her hands as she broke down.

And then she cried.

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**A/N:** Random little thing I came up with earlier today, and just finished writing. The italics are flashbacks in case you didn't get that, just some little moments shared between them.

Yeah, and the ending wasn't actually that said, it wasn't happy, she's just doing the same thing over and over again, I meant for the flashbacks to show that this has happened before (maybe more than once). So yeah, that's about it. I make no sense and I know it. )


End file.
